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Acknowledging the consequence does not require me to condemn the person. That is the maturity I didn't have before, and her ability to hear that distinction is part of the bravery she didn't have before. We both changed, and I want to give my mother credit for something enormous: she became brave enough to hear me and hold space for me without making it about hear fear, her grief, her hurt feelings, or her guilt.

Because choosing yourself doesn’t suddenly make you immune to guilt. If anything, it amplifies it.

One can reflect and acknowledge what happened to them, but if they are not able to at least speak to someone about it, then, in my opinion, they are still sitting in the shame, guilt, and secrecy of the event or events. Speak up, find your truth, and set yourself free from the abuse or pain that chains you.

It didn’t start as a crisis. It started as a whisper. The kind you can ignore if you stay busy enough . . . until you can't. This is the story of how the shift began, and how I might help you navigate the same.

You might look at my life and tell yourself a story. Here's the real one, now maybe you'll take that next step forward.